Tired
by shingekinorivaille
Summary: The tiredness on her face says more than she'll ever be able to. [manga spoilers, rule 63 eren]


852

It's a typical night.

Sitting at his makeshift desk, Jean stares at the paperwork in front of him. This part of his job is still foreign to him, and quite honestly, his mind goes incredibly blank while working on it. He can't help but feel relief at the fact that most of his day to day was focused on battle because, had he joined the Military Police, this would have been the rest of his damn life.

He hears his door creak open and shut quickly. It has to be Eren. She doesn't usually knock, but instead enters silently (unless she's raging about something, but tonight doesn't seem to be one of those nights). The only other people who would burst into his room without knocking are Sasha and Connie, but they make their presence known long before the door even opens, considering the two of them only have one volume and it's loud as hell.

He glances over his shoulder. Eren's pulling off her boots, letting them land haphazardly by his door. She shrugs off her jacket, letting it land beside his bed. She faceplants onto his bed with a large sigh. Her belts had already come off and Jean suspected that they were most definitely strewn in a tangled mess on her bed that she never sleeps in.

Not that Eren was a messy person, per se. But she had some issues with cleaning up after herself when she's too tired, which recently, has been all the time.

He continues to watch her silently as she rolls onto her back. She stares at the ceiling for a few brief moments before letting her eyes meet his. She looks exhausted. Jean can't help but notice a stream of emotions he can't quite place fluttering through her eyes. It's become the norm. She won't say much about what she's thinking or whatever it is that's running through her mind.

He suspects that she's always been one to have nightmares, long before she watched her mother get eaten. She's always been a little sleep deprived. But recently? She's been much, much worse. Their normal is her sneaking into his room, falling asleep in his bed, but hardly sleeping due to whatever was haunting her every night. The tiredness was most definitely from the lack of sleep, but Jean also felt like it had to do with the weight that lays on her shoulders. This war that has relied on her for multiple years now is nowhere near an end with humanity being much bigger and more aggressive than planned, the obvious issue of titans (both intelligent and otherwise), and being known as humanity's last hope means she has to at least _try _and appear optimistic while ignoring the fact that her life will inevitably be cut short by the very thing that's supposed to save those living within the walls.

"Hi," she finally says, her voice soft.

"Hi," he replies.

Silence.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

She nods. "Tired."

He stands, "Okay. Get out of the rest of your uniform before you fall asleep at least. It won't feel great to sleep in those."

She nods again, peeling off her pants and shirt before slipping under the covers. She stares at him, her bright green eyes not full of the same passionate light that drew him in in the first place.

Jean quickly strips out of his own uniform, deciding that it can stay on the floor tonight. He can worry about it in the morning. He hops into bed beside her and pulls her close, pressing a kiss to her neck. "What's wrong?" he tries, although he's fully aware that she has no interest in sharing what's troubling her.

She shrugs. "Nightmares. Nothing unusual."

He furrows his brows, but feeling how small she his in his grip, he decides not to fight her. Has she even been eating enough? He needs to keep a better eye on her.

"Okay," he says. "Still, you can always talk to me. I'm here," he gives her a light squeeze and he feels her snuggle a little closer to confirm that she heard him.

"Is it okay if I sleep?" she asks.

Jean can feel his heart breaking slowly at how small her voice is. This isn't his Eren, or the Eren the others know. Something inside of her has broken, and he knows he can't fix it. No one else can fix it either, since no one else knows. He's fighting a battle he can't win, but what are the consequences of losing?

Losing her will happen no matter what. She will die, and that's an unfortunate fact that he tries to ignore most days. But there's something darker than that happening, and he's afraid she'll be gone long before she's meant to be, and it won't be through the cold grasp known as death.

"Of course," he replies.

She turns to face him. The tiredness on her face says more than she'll ever be able to.

"Thank you," she mumbles. "Good night."

"Good night," he says, tucking a stray hair behind her ear. "I love you."

"I love you too."

It's a typical night.

* * *

**Considering we have no idea how Eren got to where he currently is, I can portray this but however I want I guess? Was it good? I'm surprised I managed to get anything out this month, as I'm currently in Japan! Let me know what you think!**


End file.
